Retiree Stories

The Impact of Kindness on lives

The impact of kindness on lives can be very powerful, it can change negative attitude into positive and productive one. It doesn’t matter however, small the act of kindness is, still it can have a major impact on someone’s life. Kindness can strengthen relationships, have a major influence on a community’s development. You had a bad day, however, if someone just a smiles or compliment you, that can change that feeling of the terrible day.

Sometimes, I ask myself how can you put someone first instead of yourself? With this busy world we are living in, how can I start thinking of helping someone else instead of myself. We are living in a me me world, we forget other people. One thing we always forget is being kind or polite however, simple, that act can make the most significant impact on someone’s day or life.

Small Acts of Kindness

Just take a step back and look at yourself and reflect how many times have you taken just a few minutes from your hectic schedule doing something for someone else or just offering a helping hand? When was the last time you offered someone a seat on a packed train? If you offer someone a seat who’s less able than you, your act of kindness would perhaps have changed that person’s attitude or perception if it was negative one that people in London don’t care about other people, why should they offer you a seat they don’t know you, however, this one will be a positive one that there are kind people on trains.

Just imagine if you didn’t offer that seat and that person collapsed in front of you? How would you feel as a human being. You would feel bad and that feeling may even spoil your whole day.

Kindness to Strangers  

What would be the impact of kindness to lives of strangers. Giving helping hand to someone shouldn’t be limited to people we know. We can help strangers too. As a human being, sometimes, you don’t need to know someone in order to be kind to them. You can be kind to strangers as you don’t know how much that stranger needs your help however, small it’s. Kindness to strangers sometimes can be a blessing, as nobody knows what future holds for them.

There so many stories regarding the impact of kindness on lives. However, I love this true story , when it came out in late 80s it circulated to more than thousand people how the act of kindness to strangers changed someone’s life or had an impact this person’s live.

The story is about “A Rich Family and an Orphan or Poor Boy”

It is amazing how that rich family showed kindness to a total stranger: A rich family was travelling in their very expensive car going on holiday.  On their way they stopped for lunch/refreshment. The place where they had lunch, was also a big stop for upcountry coaches. Coaches would stop there for passengers to have break, eat and freshen too.

While the rich family was enjoying their meal, a young boy was standing a few feet away. The young boy looked very miserable and hungry too. The small boy from the rich family, told his father, that boy looks very hungry can I give him some of my food?

However, with all the muggings/pickpockets and endless begging that was very common at the place, it was a big dilemma for the family because they were not sure whether that young boy was one of the passengers or one of those pickpockets.  Eventually, the small boy, got up and approached the young boy and asked him why he was not eating anything. When the parents so that, they asked the young boy to join them at the table.

Then they asked him why he was miserable, he told them that he was on his way to boarding school, unfortunately, he has lost all the money which his mother had given him. The money was meant to cover school fees and other expense. To make matters worse, his mother was a widow and that was the only money she had given him after selling some of her farm produce.

When the rich family heard about that young boy’s misfortune, the father was very sympathetic, he paid for boy’s food. Then before they left, he gave him an envelope and some money to spend on his journey to school. He told the young boy, just go to your school, everything will be alright. When he reached at school, he opened the sealed envelope, to his surprise, there was enough money to cover for the whole year’s school fees and other expenses and the rich man’s contacts. The young man wrote the date on the envelope and kept that envelope safely.

Unfortunately, on their way the rich family was involved in a very bad accident both parents died. The boy had to go and live with the auntie. At the beginning the auntie was treating him well because he was using the wealth which the parents left.

After a few years, the kindness of the auntie evaporated, she start mistreating her nephew. The young boy had to move from one relative to another. The situation was so bad the young boy couldn’t continue with his studies. One day he decided to go into offices and start begging for help.

He entered one office and introduced himself that he was looking for help at least to buy food. He wanted to continue with his studies unfortunately, he couldn’t afford the fees and other expenses.

The secretary didn’t allow the boy to see the boss, fortunately, before he could walk out of the office, the boss walked in. When the officer saw that young man, something strange played into his mind. He asked the secretary why the boy was there, did he want anything from the office?  She said yes, he’s asking for some assistance. The officer asked the boy to come into his office. He offered him a seat and asked the secretary to bring some water and juice for the boy because he looked very tired and dehydrated.

Then the officer asked his name and what assistance he wanted. He told him, he would like to continue with his studies unfortunately, he couldn’t afford to pay the fees, so he was looking for a cleaning job or any manual job that could pay him perhaps he could save enough so that he could finish his education. He asked why his parents couldn’t pay his fees. The boy explained that one day, while on their way to holiday, they were involved in a bad accident and both of his parents died on the spot.

Suddenly, the officer remembered the old envelope, he pulled the drawers, took that old envelope with the name of the rich family that helped him more than 10 years ago. To his surprise the date on the envelope was the same day they helped him.  Then he recognised the young man that it was the same little boy who he met 10 years ago and he was the 1st one to approach him and offered him help.

He asked the young man, to stay and wait for a few minutes. He went into another office, he cried and remembered they were the same people who saved his education, without their kindness and compassionate he wouldn’t be there today. He wouldn’t have afforded the school fees, but that family rescued him. Then he felt a big relief that at least he would be of help to the young man too. He told the young man don’t worry, I will pay for your school fees and I will take care of you.

He took him back to his house, asked the maid to prepare some food and the guest room.

After the young man had rested, they had dinner. Then the host said today, I wouldn’t be here, if it wasn’t for the powerful act of kindness of your parents. One day I was going to school and someone stole all my money for school fees and other incidentals. I didn’t have a penny, but your father helped me. I was a total stranger, he gave me some money to cover the school fees and other expenses, as such I was able to finish my education.

Now because of their act of kindness to help a stranger, it’s my turn to help you. I will look after you. After a few months he was allowed to adopt the young man, and he was able to finish his education. We can see how the kindness is a powerful act that can impact lives. For these two people it changed both of their lives and also helped to improve their relationship.

Kindness should’t based on Someone’s Status

Kindness shouldn’t be forced, however, it should be motivated by a genuine desire to help or change someone’s life. Put a smile into someone’s face. Make a positive impact on someone’s life, an act of kindness shouldn’t depend on someone’s status. Act of kindness should be for all irrespective of someone’s status, belief, background or colour. It’s a known fact that some people give someone something expecting that they’ll get something back. You compliment me just because of my status and not as an individual.

It’s important that we treat each person as an individual irrespective of their status. You don’t show kindness to someone simply because he so and so or he’s famous that is not right. Treat each person the same you would like to be treated.

There is a biblical story regarding not being kind to someone simply because he is poor. ” A Rich Man and poor man –Lazarus”. The rich man had everything plenty of food, nice clothes etc. However, Lazarus was very poor with bad sores  he was lying  at the gates of the rich man hopping that he would be able to get some leftovers or even pick some droplets on the floor. The rich man didn’t care about this poor Lazarus. Lazarus continued to suffer until he died.

When the rich man died, to his surprise when he was tormented in hell, he lifted his eyes and saw Lazarus sitting at Abraham’s side. Then the rich man called out “Father Abraham, have mercy on me, and send Lazarus to dip the end of his finger in water and cool my tongue, for I am in anguish in this flame” But father Abraham said child, remember what you had in your life time?

The rich man had everything in excess, but he couldn’t give to the poor man even the left overs, or even to acknowledge that someone was by the gate. What would have costed the rich man, peanuts? But, his heart was so hardened, he couldn’t help the poor man. Had he known what was waiting for him in his life after death, he would have acted with kindness to Lazarus.

Kindness and Mental Health

Happiness can help to boost our mental health.  Act of kindness also helps to improve marriages, friendship and relationships. According to research, kindness and our mental health are deeply connected.  Kindness can help bit isolation and can create a sense of belonging. It also helps to reduce stress.

The impact of kindness on lives and brings happiness into someone’s life. One day, I asked my husband, how much did it cost him? Why did I ask that question. On our way from our morning walks, we were passing by the car sales office. The sales man was reversing the car into the pavement, though we could have passed, however, we stopped to give him a chance to reverse. After that the man smile and said thank you. That was very kind of him. Hence, I asked how much did it cost? My husband answered with a big smile too ” the cost is just our appreciation”. That act made us that day happy people. Let’s change our attitude towards other people.

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